To every woman who was at home on Valentine's thinking it was a boring night alone. One day you will meet someone and find out why it never worked out with anyone else. Stay precious ladies!
My Response:
Thanks for being encouraging!!
Saturday
You were at home for Valentines - m4w - 28 (Pasadena)
Missed Connection:
To every woman who was at home on Valentine's thinking it was a boring night alone. One day you will meet someone and find out why it never worked out with anyone else. Stay precious ladies!
My Response:
Thanks for being encouraging!!
To every woman who was at home on Valentine's thinking it was a boring night alone. One day you will meet someone and find out why it never worked out with anyone else. Stay precious ladies!
My Response:
Thanks for being encouraging!!
Horny > Oogle CL > Distracted by photography > Still horny - m4w - 23 (near the 10/405)
Missed Connection:
If you sent me something before, please try again. (I didn't get it.)
My Response:
I am not sure what I think of this. Your butt is weird. Well, here's the picture I tried sending before:
If you sent me something before, please try again. (I didn't get it.)
My Response:
I am not sure what I think of this. Your butt is weird. Well, here's the picture I tried sending before:
the kids aren't alright - m4w - 19 (USC)
Missed Connection:
We had the best night ever you won a couple games we took care of drunk people and danced a lil bit, we even went out for a midnight snack. ended horribly thanks to some one else. just wanted to say sorry it was very awesome to meet you. thought there was a connection but I'm sure its totally gone now. hopefully you want to talk again sometime maybe we can start over.
My Response:
How did you know that Uncle Sam is my role model!!!!!!!!!!? ESPECIALLY DRUNK UNCLE SAM--- O- M- G!!!!! (lols----jkjk). Um-- ya it kinda sucked that Brad decided to barf on your new suede Hilfiger shoes and didn't even apologize! Who does that???? I say tell him to dry clean your shit or else. See you on campus! BUSINESS SCHOOL! What what!
We had the best night ever you won a couple games we took care of drunk people and danced a lil bit, we even went out for a midnight snack. ended horribly thanks to some one else. just wanted to say sorry it was very awesome to meet you. thought there was a connection but I'm sure its totally gone now. hopefully you want to talk again sometime maybe we can start over.
My Response:
How did you know that Uncle Sam is my role model!!!!!!!!!!? ESPECIALLY DRUNK UNCLE SAM--- O- M- G!!!!! (lols----jkjk). Um-- ya it kinda sucked that Brad decided to barf on your new suede Hilfiger shoes and didn't even apologize! Who does that???? I say tell him to dry clean your shit or else. See you on campus! BUSINESS SCHOOL! What what!
Monday
dancing at SHORTSTOP - w4m - 23 (silverlake)
My Missed Connection Post:
you thought i liked you but i swear i didn't. you are too German for me.
you thought i liked you but i swear i didn't. you are too German for me.
i don't like it when you sit next to me - w4m - 23 (hollywood)
My Missed Connection Post:
you smell bad. i hope you spelled my name wrong when you wrote it down in your notebook.
you smell bad. i hope you spelled my name wrong when you wrote it down in your notebook.
Sunday
Amber Nelson - m4w - 39 (Easton, Pa)
Missed Connection:
moved out here about year ago.... Where are you???????
My Response:
I am hiding! From YOU!!!!
moved out here about year ago.... Where are you???????
My Response:
I am hiding! From YOU!!!!
RE: Peet's Coffee & Tea - w4m - 28 (Tarzana) - m4w (TARZANA)
Missed Connection:
I REMEBER YOU BABY. YOU WERE SEXY AND LOKING AT ME ALL DAY. DON BE SHY BABY I DON BITE...UNLES YOU LIKE IT.. JA JA JA. SEND TELEFON
My Response:
Thank god you got back to me with your unibrow.
I REMEBER YOU BABY. YOU WERE SEXY AND LOKING AT ME ALL DAY. DON BE SHY BABY I DON BITE...UNLES YOU LIKE IT.. JA JA JA. SEND TELEFON
My Response:
Thank god you got back to me with your unibrow.
Saturday
To the asian girl walking the three legged dog - m4w
Missed Connection:
I know you don't own a three legged dog and I doubt you're asian either... so why are you reading this? Honestly, why are you reading this? Almost everyone on here is so retarded. It's such a waste of time to read these and they're not even interesting. Instead, you could be out meeting real people, doing something productive, or at least reading something more interesting (yes, I realize this makes me a hypocrite). When was the last time you read a book? I bet it's been a while. You have no problem reading page after page of useless uninteresting crap with horrible spelling and grammar but you can't make yourself sit down and read a well written, interesting, and perhaps even informative book. Why? Please, just consider this for a bit.
My Response:
I read Sartre every night- along with self help books on how to become a more attractive- I mean, profitable person in my workplace. (I'm a stripper). Also- Bukowski is God. So- don't tell me I'm illiterate and stupid and unworldly- OK!!?!??!? I know about Confucius.
His Response:
You're very strange.
--Caleb
My Response:
I am what makes life interesting!
I know you don't own a three legged dog and I doubt you're asian either... so why are you reading this? Honestly, why are you reading this? Almost everyone on here is so retarded. It's such a waste of time to read these and they're not even interesting. Instead, you could be out meeting real people, doing something productive, or at least reading something more interesting (yes, I realize this makes me a hypocrite). When was the last time you read a book? I bet it's been a while. You have no problem reading page after page of useless uninteresting crap with horrible spelling and grammar but you can't make yourself sit down and read a well written, interesting, and perhaps even informative book. Why? Please, just consider this for a bit.
My Response:
I read Sartre every night- along with self help books on how to become a more attractive- I mean, profitable person in my workplace. (I'm a stripper). Also- Bukowski is God. So- don't tell me I'm illiterate and stupid and unworldly- OK!!?!??!? I know about Confucius.
His Response:
You're very strange.
--Caleb
My Response:
I am what makes life interesting!
Friday
Looking for someone to hang with. - m4w - 29 (San Gabriel)
Missed Connection:
Hey, I'm a down to earth single guy looking for a down to earth single woman. I love women in general so race doesn't matter. My main attractions are Asian,Latin,and white,but all races are attractive to me. so hit me up.
My Response:
The way you use sepia and black and white on the same picture turns me on. It shows you know how to use photoshop. Hit me up for sure! I am white-- but sometimes people think I'm black. Is that ok?
His Response:
Yeah thats all good. I like women of all races. Let me know whats up.
My Response:
This is what's up, dawg:
Hey, I'm a down to earth single guy looking for a down to earth single woman. I love women in general so race doesn't matter. My main attractions are Asian,Latin,and white,but all races are attractive to me. so hit me up.
My Response:
The way you use sepia and black and white on the same picture turns me on. It shows you know how to use photoshop. Hit me up for sure! I am white-- but sometimes people think I'm black. Is that ok?
His Response:
Yeah thats all good. I like women of all races. Let me know whats up.
My Response:
This is what's up, dawg:
hey woman - m4w (over here)
Missed Connection:
i want my chicken back. can you please bring it back?
My Response:
Only if you give me my fucking duck.
i want my chicken back. can you please bring it back?
My Response:
Only if you give me my fucking duck.
Albertsons - California Pizza Kitchen Pizza - m4w (Calabasas)
Missed Connections:
We spoke briefly in the frozen foods section in Albertsons on Agoura Rd. You raved about how great California Pizza Kitchen Pizzas were. How you told all your friends about it and how they loved it too. I would love to talk more...over coffe...tea or pizza :) I know its a long shot, but if your reading this, hit me up.
My Response:
I will hit you up at Ralphs' frozen food section this weekend...but this time I'll bring a cooked version of one of the CPK pizzas. I'll crack a bottle of wine...light some candles- say sweet nothings to you. I honestly have made those CPK pizzas my number one topic of the week for the last three weeks. Is that crazy??? I don't think so....they're fuckin' good...BBQ CHICKEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
His Response:
Now that sounds great, but I think we would get kicked out of Ralphs for sure. I took two of the BBQ Chickens home that day. They were pretty good. Although, I like them better at CPK's. In fact I like the thai chicken one best...and I don't share that one. maybe with some wine...I might :)
My Response:
I forgot. I am allergic to wine.
We spoke briefly in the frozen foods section in Albertsons on Agoura Rd. You raved about how great California Pizza Kitchen Pizzas were. How you told all your friends about it and how they loved it too. I would love to talk more...over coffe...tea or pizza :) I know its a long shot, but if your reading this, hit me up.
My Response:
I will hit you up at Ralphs' frozen food section this weekend...but this time I'll bring a cooked version of one of the CPK pizzas. I'll crack a bottle of wine...light some candles- say sweet nothings to you. I honestly have made those CPK pizzas my number one topic of the week for the last three weeks. Is that crazy??? I don't think so....they're fuckin' good...BBQ CHICKEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
His Response:
Now that sounds great, but I think we would get kicked out of Ralphs for sure. I took two of the BBQ Chickens home that day. They were pretty good. Although, I like them better at CPK's. In fact I like the thai chicken one best...and I don't share that one. maybe with some wine...I might :)
My Response:
I forgot. I am allergic to wine.
subway - m4w (hollywood)
Missed Connection:
really hot girl at subway today, to bad on the phone the whole time
My Response:
Does that mean I'm less attractive to you now? It better not. I love my Sidekick more than sex.
really hot girl at subway today, to bad on the phone the whole time
My Response:
Does that mean I'm less attractive to you now? It better not. I love my Sidekick more than sex.
Beverly Hills Ralphs Parking - m4w (Beverly Hills)
Missed Connection:
You told me I was cute.. I told you, you were cute too.....
I would like to do something about that......
My Response:
Let's get matching scarves and sunglasses. Kitson? American Apparel? What do you think? Do you have a chihuahua???
You told me I was cute.. I told you, you were cute too.....
I would like to do something about that......
My Response:
Let's get matching scarves and sunglasses. Kitson? American Apparel? What do you think? Do you have a chihuahua???
Thursday
les deux monday night! - m4w - 23 (hollywood)
Missed Connection:
i joked with you about how you meet guys on craigslist, and now i am attempting to contact you through craigslist again :-)
I'm tall and Caucasian. you're beautiful and ethnically ambiguous. I'm brian and you're brianna. if this isn't magical, i don't know what is.
My Response:
Coincidences are crazy. It totally makes life INTERESTING (versus NOT INTERESTING). BTW_ It's totally crazy that we're practically twins (Brian AND Briana- i mean- who thought to bring us together!??!? Obviously JESUS!!)
i joked with you about how you meet guys on craigslist, and now i am attempting to contact you through craigslist again :-)
I'm tall and Caucasian. you're beautiful and ethnically ambiguous. I'm brian and you're brianna. if this isn't magical, i don't know what is.
My Response:
Coincidences are crazy. It totally makes life INTERESTING (versus NOT INTERESTING). BTW_ It's totally crazy that we're practically twins (Brian AND Briana- i mean- who thought to bring us together!??!? Obviously JESUS!!)
GIN - m4w - 32 (AROUND)
Missed Connection:
lets play a game, chess, rummy, dominos, WISHING YOU WERE HERE. you know who you are.
I just have one question, do i ever cross your mind?
My Response:
Only in a game of tic tac toe.
lets play a game, chess, rummy, dominos, WISHING YOU WERE HERE. you know who you are.
I just have one question, do i ever cross your mind?
My Response:
Only in a game of tic tac toe.
Tuesday
Diva - m4w - 29
Missed Connection:
So, we've actually met before, but it didnt go well, to say the least. Ive seen you around and been too embarrassed to say hi quite a few times since then. It turns out that we had some mutual friends, who you then became.. um.. not friends with and then later I became not friends with as well. So that didnt help anyone. It sucks because every once in a while Ill come across your myspace thing via someone else we both know or like and think - wow, this girl is awesome.. we should hang out and watch Shark or Sgt Kabukiman or something.. then I remember that we DID meet and it was a disaster. So, here's to hoping that -
A: you see this
B: you have an open mind for second chances. or, second-and-a-half-chances maybe, if coincidences count for anything.
C: if the next time goes horribly as well, we can still watch movies or something.
ok.. here goes...
My Response:
Is there an option D? I guess option A already happened(because I did see your post). Option B (about me having an open mind)- I am not sure about that because I am a Conservative Catholic. And- Option C (about watching movies with you)- I hate movies. It's called: READ A BOOK! DUH! But hey- are you Catholic? We can go to church if you like that idea. Church is MY "movie-going" experience (without the popcorn and big screen)....kidding!!!!!! I CRACK MYSELF UP! Ok- but seriously- are you Catholic? I only date those...
So, we've actually met before, but it didnt go well, to say the least. Ive seen you around and been too embarrassed to say hi quite a few times since then. It turns out that we had some mutual friends, who you then became.. um.. not friends with and then later I became not friends with as well. So that didnt help anyone. It sucks because every once in a while Ill come across your myspace thing via someone else we both know or like and think - wow, this girl is awesome.. we should hang out and watch Shark or Sgt Kabukiman or something.. then I remember that we DID meet and it was a disaster. So, here's to hoping that -
A: you see this
B: you have an open mind for second chances. or, second-and-a-half-chances maybe, if coincidences count for anything.
C: if the next time goes horribly as well, we can still watch movies or something.
ok.. here goes...
My Response:
Is there an option D? I guess option A already happened(because I did see your post). Option B (about me having an open mind)- I am not sure about that because I am a Conservative Catholic. And- Option C (about watching movies with you)- I hate movies. It's called: READ A BOOK! DUH! But hey- are you Catholic? We can go to church if you like that idea. Church is MY "movie-going" experience (without the popcorn and big screen)....kidding!!!!!! I CRACK MYSELF UP! Ok- but seriously- are you Catholic? I only date those...
Teena in red corvette - m4w (behind you)
Missed Connection:
Teena I miss you, please drive your little red corvette to me. I see you and I want you. I want to cover you with whip cream and lick it all off of you then cover you with vaseline and fuck you like it will never happen again. I'm married, your married but I still want a shot at that sweet tiny behind. I want to feel you all over from that tiny butt to those two beautiful implanted boobies. I want to run my tongue down the crack of that tight ass, up past that sweet patch and stop just long enough to suck each of those two beauties. Give me a sign, just a hint that it's okay to jump your bones. I promise you will be sore and we can go back to our spouses like it did not happen. I won't ask for or give seconds, just let me have it one time. it will be our secret.
My Response:
I will tell your wife about your plan so that she can help you cut out coupons to buy vaseline, whip cream, and condoms 50% off. And- puta, do NOT say I have implants. You have not felt them....YET.
His Response (as "bob bush"):
oh my sweet cherry pie. Your not my Teena. My teena is a real girl with such a fine behind, smooth skin, and her titties are implants, she has the nicest mouth, I'm sure it would take all of me. so please Alessanda. your not Teena, not my Teena. Ours is a love that will not die, can not die and will most likely die only with my Teena and I. Now if you want a little somethin somethin, you know about that, let me know and we can hook up.
His Response (2 hours later):
i'm sorry, i forgot one thing, fuck off you puta calling mexican skank ass whore. After I'm done bitch slapping you I may just pop a nut up your ugly fat hemroid filled ass. faggot bitch.
His Response (35 minutes later):
hey puta, what ever the fuck that is. here is a little something for you. your not my Teena, my Teena is all woman, smooth, clean, fresh, exciting, nothing like you. My teena has all her teeth, my teena swallows, you just suck.
My Response:
Why why why all the hate?!??!??! Don't ever underestimate a woman without teeth. I'm way better than a woman with implants. So what if I have hemroids? I bet you have herpes.
His Response:
oh my sweet thing, now you do have my attention, put on your party dress and lets party. tell me more about how good you can be, honest I am clean, scrub a dub dub lets jump i the tub, but I know your not my teena, but if you want you can be Alessandra, do you like whip cream?
My Response:
I like it all too well in an ass crack.
Teena I miss you, please drive your little red corvette to me. I see you and I want you. I want to cover you with whip cream and lick it all off of you then cover you with vaseline and fuck you like it will never happen again. I'm married, your married but I still want a shot at that sweet tiny behind. I want to feel you all over from that tiny butt to those two beautiful implanted boobies. I want to run my tongue down the crack of that tight ass, up past that sweet patch and stop just long enough to suck each of those two beauties. Give me a sign, just a hint that it's okay to jump your bones. I promise you will be sore and we can go back to our spouses like it did not happen. I won't ask for or give seconds, just let me have it one time. it will be our secret.
My Response:
I will tell your wife about your plan so that she can help you cut out coupons to buy vaseline, whip cream, and condoms 50% off. And- puta, do NOT say I have implants. You have not felt them....YET.
His Response (as "bob bush"):
oh my sweet cherry pie. Your not my Teena. My teena is a real girl with such a fine behind, smooth skin, and her titties are implants, she has the nicest mouth, I'm sure it would take all of me. so please Alessanda. your not Teena, not my Teena. Ours is a love that will not die, can not die and will most likely die only with my Teena and I. Now if you want a little somethin somethin, you know about that, let me know and we can hook up.
His Response (2 hours later):
i'm sorry, i forgot one thing, fuck off you puta calling mexican skank ass whore. After I'm done bitch slapping you I may just pop a nut up your ugly fat hemroid filled ass. faggot bitch.
His Response (35 minutes later):
hey puta, what ever the fuck that is. here is a little something for you. your not my Teena, my Teena is all woman, smooth, clean, fresh, exciting, nothing like you. My teena has all her teeth, my teena swallows, you just suck.
My Response:
Why why why all the hate?!??!??! Don't ever underestimate a woman without teeth. I'm way better than a woman with implants. So what if I have hemroids? I bet you have herpes.
His Response:
oh my sweet thing, now you do have my attention, put on your party dress and lets party. tell me more about how good you can be, honest I am clean, scrub a dub dub lets jump i the tub, but I know your not my teena, but if you want you can be Alessandra, do you like whip cream?
My Response:
I like it all too well in an ass crack.
Monday
girl with PINK HAIR at home depot. sunday feb. 15 - m4w - 25 (silver lake)
Missed Connection:
to the extremely insanely cute girl, with PINK HAIR...
YOU: were at home depot sunday feb.15 around 7 or 7:30ish pm. u have streched ear lobes, pink hair, i think it was only the front part, u bought (i think) something from the very last section of the store, it wasnt a ladder, if u read this youll know what im talking about, and u can confirm this...
ME: i work there, tall, blue jeans, and a beige shirt, goatee, kind of long with two piercings on the lip, and glasses. i was walking in the front (spoting or guiding) my supervisor who was driving a red forklift and i saw u right in front of paint department. he told me u look but i didnt believe it, u were just to cute to look at someone like me. i wouldve said hi, but i was guiding the driver, and i had to.
i know this is a long shot, but you are well worth it. like i said you are so insanely, freaking cute, and i love your style, and honeslty i think u are cool as fuck. if (and iam really hoping) u read this, please get back at me, i would love to say hi....julio....
PS>>oh yeah, neither me or my supervisor (he was wearing a hat) were wearing an apron, we didnt wanna get bother. but u can bother me anytime...
My Response:
I used to drive a forklift at OSH across the street (but I got fired for lying about being able to drive it). Talk about coincidences. Do you happen to like fetish porn and bondage? Because that would be a coincidence too...
KIDDING!
So...what music do you like? Grunge? 90s? I'm so 90s because I was born then....
His Response:
osh!! bleh...you know ure reallyfunny, so u must be a nice person. 90 music is the best. i actually like every kind of music (original huh?)
My Response:
I am actually a bitch. I don't know how you think funny people are ever nice...but ok. Do you seriously not have a music preference? Are you a big fan of ANY band? Like Ace of Base? No Doubt? Garbage???? HOLE!?!?!??! Those are classics you for sure need to be aware of....
His Response:
oi like alittle of everything. but mostly metal and rap, not the cluby kind. so what else are you into?? how old are you?? and u wanna tell me more about yourself? geet ack at me..julio...
My Response:
I am 18. I like quality music and really good art, like anything Kat Von Di tatoos on people. Do you have tattoos? I have one on my buttcheek. It's a panther. It means "strength."
His Response:
of course i have a favorite band, its all about the knot, SLIPKNOT, thats my favorite band of all time, static-x, otep, molotov, then, mos deft, talib kweli, commom, krs one, De la soul, no doubt, korn, CKY, AC/DC, led zepelling, the doors, the list goes on and on .tattoos? of course, i have some, more than an armband, half my arm its done, a start on the other, and hafl my leg its almost done as well, i could send u a pic, but since im a gentlement, im gonna let u do that first. send me a pic, if u can one of your tattoo as well. ill return the favor. myspacce perhaps?? and, i still think ur cool, just because youre funny, the bitch thing, i dont know yet, but you sound pretty straight forward. well, hope to hear from u soon..,..julio...
PS>>oh yeah, im 25, and live on silver lake. where do u live?? movies, lets talk movies, favorite kind?? and i guess my preference is metal
My Response:
How about I like funny ass movies like Mall Cop and Madea Goes to Jail!???!!! What what. Slipknot is sick, yo. I live in Silverlake and I want to make metal music but I am too scared to freak out my grandma. Ok - here is a pic of me (before the pink hair and hotness):
His Response:
wait, a couple of things, is that a neck brace?? what happend?? how long ago was this?
and, u mentioned pink hair, was that really you?? i mean the one i saw at home depot?? the one i wrote the posting about?? if this is you...what did u buy that day??? it was at the very last section of the store, im just curious if this posting really did work.....and if not, u made a friend anyway, if ure willing to take my friendship of course, just let me know if this is really you.......i still think ure pretty cool....hope to hear from u soon....julio....
My Response:
i get confused sometimes when people say they saw me at this and this place with pink hair because the pink hair i have is not on my head- just my arms and legs. so if you mention pink hair- I am just like- oh ya- I have pink hair- how could I forget? Also, I get so used to the neckbrace I am wearing right now that I forget it's on me sometimes). But good news about the brace- I can stilll head bang!!!! So ya-I guess the person at Home Depot wasn't me. Thanks for your friend requests on Friendster, Myspace, and Facebook though! I MIGHT accept it! LOL JKJK JK!
to the extremely insanely cute girl, with PINK HAIR...
YOU: were at home depot sunday feb.15 around 7 or 7:30ish pm. u have streched ear lobes, pink hair, i think it was only the front part, u bought (i think) something from the very last section of the store, it wasnt a ladder, if u read this youll know what im talking about, and u can confirm this...
ME: i work there, tall, blue jeans, and a beige shirt, goatee, kind of long with two piercings on the lip, and glasses. i was walking in the front (spoting or guiding) my supervisor who was driving a red forklift and i saw u right in front of paint department. he told me u look but i didnt believe it, u were just to cute to look at someone like me. i wouldve said hi, but i was guiding the driver, and i had to.
i know this is a long shot, but you are well worth it. like i said you are so insanely, freaking cute, and i love your style, and honeslty i think u are cool as fuck. if (and iam really hoping) u read this, please get back at me, i would love to say hi....julio....
PS>>oh yeah, neither me or my supervisor (he was wearing a hat) were wearing an apron, we didnt wanna get bother. but u can bother me anytime...
My Response:
I used to drive a forklift at OSH across the street (but I got fired for lying about being able to drive it). Talk about coincidences. Do you happen to like fetish porn and bondage? Because that would be a coincidence too...
KIDDING!
So...what music do you like? Grunge? 90s? I'm so 90s because I was born then....
His Response:
osh!! bleh...you know ure reallyfunny, so u must be a nice person. 90 music is the best. i actually like every kind of music (original huh?)
My Response:
I am actually a bitch. I don't know how you think funny people are ever nice...but ok. Do you seriously not have a music preference? Are you a big fan of ANY band? Like Ace of Base? No Doubt? Garbage???? HOLE!?!?!??! Those are classics you for sure need to be aware of....
His Response:
oi like alittle of everything. but mostly metal and rap, not the cluby kind. so what else are you into?? how old are you?? and u wanna tell me more about yourself? geet ack at me..julio...
My Response:
I am 18. I like quality music and really good art, like anything Kat Von Di tatoos on people. Do you have tattoos? I have one on my buttcheek. It's a panther. It means "strength."
His Response:
of course i have a favorite band, its all about the knot, SLIPKNOT, thats my favorite band of all time, static-x, otep, molotov, then, mos deft, talib kweli, commom, krs one, De la soul, no doubt, korn, CKY, AC/DC, led zepelling, the doors, the list goes on and on .tattoos? of course, i have some, more than an armband, half my arm its done, a start on the other, and hafl my leg its almost done as well, i could send u a pic, but since im a gentlement, im gonna let u do that first. send me a pic, if u can one of your tattoo as well. ill return the favor. myspacce perhaps?? and, i still think ur cool, just because youre funny, the bitch thing, i dont know yet, but you sound pretty straight forward. well, hope to hear from u soon..,..julio...
PS>>oh yeah, im 25, and live on silver lake. where do u live?? movies, lets talk movies, favorite kind?? and i guess my preference is metal
My Response:
How about I like funny ass movies like Mall Cop and Madea Goes to Jail!???!!! What what. Slipknot is sick, yo. I live in Silverlake and I want to make metal music but I am too scared to freak out my grandma. Ok - here is a pic of me (before the pink hair and hotness):
His Response:
wait, a couple of things, is that a neck brace?? what happend?? how long ago was this?
and, u mentioned pink hair, was that really you?? i mean the one i saw at home depot?? the one i wrote the posting about?? if this is you...what did u buy that day??? it was at the very last section of the store, im just curious if this posting really did work.....and if not, u made a friend anyway, if ure willing to take my friendship of course, just let me know if this is really you.......i still think ure pretty cool....hope to hear from u soon....julio....
My Response:
i get confused sometimes when people say they saw me at this and this place with pink hair because the pink hair i have is not on my head- just my arms and legs. so if you mention pink hair- I am just like- oh ya- I have pink hair- how could I forget? Also, I get so used to the neckbrace I am wearing right now that I forget it's on me sometimes). But good news about the brace- I can stilll head bang!!!! So ya-I guess the person at Home Depot wasn't me. Thanks for your friend requests on Friendster, Myspace, and Facebook though! I MIGHT accept it! LOL JKJK JK!
Sunday
maria lopes (love groove) - m4w - 25
Missed Connection:
I can't find your facebook.
My Response:
Because she don't have one. Try friendster.
His Response:
Is this the maria lopez I met last night?
My Response:
No this is her mother hoping she'll find someone who'll take her to somewhere else other than Popeye's.
His Response:
Does your daughter happen to be from Colombia?
My Response:
Bogatá bitches.
His Response (in a Facebook friend request):
You are not Maria Lopes.
I can't find your facebook.
My Response:
Because she don't have one. Try friendster.
His Response:
Is this the maria lopez I met last night?
My Response:
No this is her mother hoping she'll find someone who'll take her to somewhere else other than Popeye's.
His Response:
Does your daughter happen to be from Colombia?
My Response:
Bogatá bitches.
His Response (in a Facebook friend request):
You are not Maria Lopes.
Saturday
Milf at the gym in my apartment complex - m4w - 22 (warner center)
Missed Connection:
We had a l conversation this Thursday, i always see u check me out never realy pursued it. i been check u out for minute. You're so hot i want to do you...
My Response:
Do you speak English? Thank you for saying I am a MILF. I rarely feel that way- so yes, I'll hook up with you. Will you babysit in exchange?
His Response:
send me a picture and your number will talk
My Response:
323) 826-5309
We had a l conversation this Thursday, i always see u check me out never realy pursued it. i been check u out for minute. You're so hot i want to do you...
My Response:
Do you speak English? Thank you for saying I am a MILF. I rarely feel that way- so yes, I'll hook up with you. Will you babysit in exchange?
His Response:
send me a picture and your number will talk
My Response:
323) 826-5309
Hey Birthday Girl - m4w (Pasadena)
Missed Connection:
You definitely got my attention today. Love the purple in your hair.
My Response:
Love the green in yours. Let's make punk rock (I mean love).
You definitely got my attention today. Love the purple in your hair.
My Response:
Love the green in yours. Let's make punk rock (I mean love).
Zach's Italian Cafe Bar - m4w - 49 (hopeful)
Missed Connection:
I should have asked you to stay or have dessert, or at least properly introduced myself. Like I was discussing with your friend, it's hard to approach someone from out of the blue. I should have worn my trenchcoat.
My Response:
I should have worn MY trenchcoat! (Then we could have been twins). Next time, let's get pie and talk about action figures.
I should have asked you to stay or have dessert, or at least properly introduced myself. Like I was discussing with your friend, it's hard to approach someone from out of the blue. I should have worn my trenchcoat.
My Response:
I should have worn MY trenchcoat! (Then we could have been twins). Next time, let's get pie and talk about action figures.
Girl in Green Mini Cooper on Sunset at 2AM Friday night - m4w (West Hollywood)
Missed Connection:
You were the sexy passenger in a dark green Mini Cooper on Sunset and Crescent Heights. I was the Italian guy in a black BMW driving home after work. We exchanged smiles as we drove... You had a beautiful smile and looked very sexy. I turned to head home before I realized I should have kept driving on Sunset with the hopes of getting a red light and a chance to talk to you. I just got off work so I wasn't thinking so clearly. Hopefully you see this and we can resume where we left off...
My Response:
Should I meet you on Sunset and Crescent Heights like last time? I'll ask my friend in the green Mini Cooper to drive me there and we can reenact the moment we shared?
His Response:
Wow... this really works? How do I know it's really you? Do you have a pic?
http://doplereffecttv.com
His Response (a week later):
What happened to you Alessandra? Are you not the beautiful girl I saw that night? You had a great smile!
Joseph Greto 310.210.2235 http://doplereffecttv.com
My Response:
You're too much of a big Hollywood guy that I got too nervous to respond! Sorry! Here I am!
You were the sexy passenger in a dark green Mini Cooper on Sunset and Crescent Heights. I was the Italian guy in a black BMW driving home after work. We exchanged smiles as we drove... You had a beautiful smile and looked very sexy. I turned to head home before I realized I should have kept driving on Sunset with the hopes of getting a red light and a chance to talk to you. I just got off work so I wasn't thinking so clearly. Hopefully you see this and we can resume where we left off...
My Response:
Should I meet you on Sunset and Crescent Heights like last time? I'll ask my friend in the green Mini Cooper to drive me there and we can reenact the moment we shared?
His Response:
Wow... this really works? How do I know it's really you? Do you have a pic?
http://doplereffecttv.com
His Response (a week later):
What happened to you Alessandra? Are you not the beautiful girl I saw that night? You had a great smile!
Joseph Greto 310.210.2235 http://doplereffecttv.com
My Response:
You're too much of a big Hollywood guy that I got too nervous to respond! Sorry! Here I am!
Your knight in shining armor - m4w
Missed Connection:
Hey ladies,
I have tried for years to find someone via internet but only once has it happened so for know I am done doing to nice guy thing, dating. I want to get laid and I don't beleive in paying for it nor am I interested in all of the website promoters pretending to be real people.
I'm 100% diesee free, like to party and hoping to get laid this weekend.
My Reponse:
I forgot where I put my chastity belt, you lucky knight. But, I'm not "100% disease free" like you are requesting. Perhaps we can work out some sort of deal? You give me Gonorrhea, I give you Chlamydia?
Hey ladies,
I have tried for years to find someone via internet but only once has it happened so for know I am done doing to nice guy thing, dating. I want to get laid and I don't beleive in paying for it nor am I interested in all of the website promoters pretending to be real people.
I'm 100% diesee free, like to party and hoping to get laid this weekend.
My Reponse:
I forgot where I put my chastity belt, you lucky knight. But, I'm not "100% disease free" like you are requesting. Perhaps we can work out some sort of deal? You give me Gonorrhea, I give you Chlamydia?
Macys sherman oaks saturday morning - m4w - 38 (sherman oaks)
Missed Connection:
You are tall and beautiful standing next to me to pay in the men's department and you looked at me and told me my jacket is nice. I wanna know who you are,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
My Response:
I just liked the jacket you were wearing. Where did you get it?
His Response:
Tell me what you were wearing so I know it's really you,,,,,,then I will tell you where I got it,,,
My Response:
a white cardigan- blue heels...jeans...HOTNESS
His Reponse:
wrong answer,,,,or wrong girl,,,,,, what jacket was I wearing?
My Response:
White corduroy? I know it was white because I hate jean or black jackets..they are totally stupid...
His Response:
come on stop playing around,,,,,,,,,,,,,
His Response (two minutes later):
better yet, send me your picture
My Response:
I'm NOT playing around.
His Reponse:
is that your mom?
My Response:
No- that's me...why you have to be a hater?
His Response:
I'm not a hater, you just look older in the picture that's all
You are tall and beautiful standing next to me to pay in the men's department and you looked at me and told me my jacket is nice. I wanna know who you are,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
My Response:
I just liked the jacket you were wearing. Where did you get it?
His Response:
Tell me what you were wearing so I know it's really you,,,,,,then I will tell you where I got it,,,
My Response:
a white cardigan- blue heels...jeans...HOTNESS
His Reponse:
wrong answer,,,,or wrong girl,,,,,, what jacket was I wearing?
My Response:
White corduroy? I know it was white because I hate jean or black jackets..they are totally stupid...
His Response:
come on stop playing around,,,,,,,,,,,,,
His Response (two minutes later):
better yet, send me your picture
My Response:
I'm NOT playing around.
His Reponse:
is that your mom?
My Response:
No- that's me...why you have to be a hater?
His Response:
I'm not a hater, you just look older in the picture that's all
Who is this girl? - m4w - 25 (Hollywood)
Missed Connection:
Good lord! Is she real?? I think this pic was grabbed from her MySpace or something. Anyone ever seen her in person?
My Response:
If you continue pimping my daughter out on missed connections and Myspacelayouts.com, I will have to sue you. The damage is already done, but I want this stopped now. Before you, she didn't even know about eyeliner. Now look- it's caked on like my grandmother's sweaty pantyhouse. Once an angel...now fallen...........You're killing me, Larry.
Good lord! Is she real?? I think this pic was grabbed from her MySpace or something. Anyone ever seen her in person?
My Response:
If you continue pimping my daughter out on missed connections and Myspacelayouts.com, I will have to sue you. The damage is already done, but I want this stopped now. Before you, she didn't even know about eyeliner. Now look- it's caked on like my grandmother's sweaty pantyhouse. Once an angel...now fallen...........You're killing me, Larry.
Friday
99 Cent Store: Your 5 year old sons birthday - m4w (North Hollywood)
Missed Connection:
Hi...you let me go ahead of you in line. We talked briefly about the party you were preparing for your son. I just can't get your bright eyes and smile out of my mind.
I would love to get to know you. If you see this I would love to hear back from you.
Have a great weekend!
My Response:
Do you happen to be willing to dress up as a ninja for my son's bday? He would love that. I can't really afford one right now...ninjas are hard to come by. Also- can you do a Jackie Chan accent? He loves ninjas- but he also loves Jackie Chan....
His Reponse (as theduderaul):
Does he like pirates?
My Response:
Only if the pirate has a Jackie Chan accent.
His Response:
You certainly are cheeky and bored aren't you?
Of course I know you aren't the woman I saw last night...but I am bored and will play.
And I happen to love Jackie Chan and look like a pirate!
My Response:
Oh cool- then you will dress up as one and talk like Jackie Chan on our first date?
His Reponse:
Haha! You got it!
so how will you dress up? We should match ;)
My Response:
I will not dress up ever.
His Response:
Humm...not even tassels?
His Response (2 minutes later):
By the way, this is me:
My Response:
I'm not sure if I find you attractive, but I might give it a shot. Also- I would never wear tassles for you. They always get stuck on my nipples a day after I wear them. It's good you attached your picture, though. I hate when people show up on a date and they totally don't look like how they describe themselves. Well- this is me. Hopefully you are interested?
His Reponse:
Nice! Will you be my Valentine!?
My Response:
Ok - how does that work?
His Response:
Actually, I am still trying to figure that out ;)
something to do with money I think? Or was it candy? Candy money :) ?
My Response:
I only want money.
His Response:
HaHa! You are quite the LA woman!
Hi...you let me go ahead of you in line. We talked briefly about the party you were preparing for your son. I just can't get your bright eyes and smile out of my mind.
I would love to get to know you. If you see this I would love to hear back from you.
Have a great weekend!
My Response:
Do you happen to be willing to dress up as a ninja for my son's bday? He would love that. I can't really afford one right now...ninjas are hard to come by. Also- can you do a Jackie Chan accent? He loves ninjas- but he also loves Jackie Chan....
His Reponse (as theduderaul):
Does he like pirates?
My Response:
Only if the pirate has a Jackie Chan accent.
His Response:
You certainly are cheeky and bored aren't you?
Of course I know you aren't the woman I saw last night...but I am bored and will play.
And I happen to love Jackie Chan and look like a pirate!
My Response:
Oh cool- then you will dress up as one and talk like Jackie Chan on our first date?
His Reponse:
Haha! You got it!
so how will you dress up? We should match ;)
My Response:
I will not dress up ever.
His Response:
Humm...not even tassels?
His Response (2 minutes later):
By the way, this is me:
My Response:
I'm not sure if I find you attractive, but I might give it a shot. Also- I would never wear tassles for you. They always get stuck on my nipples a day after I wear them. It's good you attached your picture, though. I hate when people show up on a date and they totally don't look like how they describe themselves. Well- this is me. Hopefully you are interested?
His Reponse:
Nice! Will you be my Valentine!?
My Response:
Ok - how does that work?
His Response:
Actually, I am still trying to figure that out ;)
something to do with money I think? Or was it candy? Candy money :) ?
My Response:
I only want money.
His Response:
HaHa! You are quite the LA woman!
L- Yoga In Southbay - m4w
Missed Connection:
L-
Obviously We are compatible in so many areas - age, height, intelligence, yoga, athletic, verbal, honest, etc, etc. I can't wait to know you better. Obviously we do have to wait until this is over. Its better anyway - I like getting to know you slowly. When you mentioned being on the pill, you have no idea how much that meant to me. Its never worked for me unless that was the case. I've been looking for the right person forever, unwilling - and yes- unable to settle for less. I'm so glad I met you! Here's to us and the future!
-M
My Response:
My downward dog- your baby pose...vice versa, vice versa... Let's make moonbeams between our legs.
L-
Obviously We are compatible in so many areas - age, height, intelligence, yoga, athletic, verbal, honest, etc, etc. I can't wait to know you better. Obviously we do have to wait until this is over. Its better anyway - I like getting to know you slowly. When you mentioned being on the pill, you have no idea how much that meant to me. Its never worked for me unless that was the case. I've been looking for the right person forever, unwilling - and yes- unable to settle for less. I'm so glad I met you! Here's to us and the future!
-M
My Response:
My downward dog- your baby pose...vice versa, vice versa... Let's make moonbeams between our legs.
Blockbuster Girl - m4w - 26 (Sunset and Orange)
Missed Connection:
Blockbuster girl at Sunset and Orange with the brown, red, and slightly purple hair. We shared a moment a about months ago...
I was in the store with a friend (a girl), but she wasn't my girlfriend... I'M SINGLE!
I rent a lot of movies and am there all the time trading in my blockbuster.com rentals...
I'd like to take you out sometime!
My Response:
Too bad I'm way lesbian and hate your movie choices...
Blockbuster girl at Sunset and Orange with the brown, red, and slightly purple hair. We shared a moment a about months ago...
I was in the store with a friend (a girl), but she wasn't my girlfriend... I'M SINGLE!
I rent a lot of movies and am there all the time trading in my blockbuster.com rentals...
I'd like to take you out sometime!
My Response:
Too bad I'm way lesbian and hate your movie choices...
Lexus Of Glendale - Cute Service Desk Girl. - m4w - 36 (Glendale)
Missed Connection:
I saw you working the service cash desk the other day and wanted to ask you out. But you were working and thought it was unprofessional to do so. But I came in today (02/12) to pickup my vehicle and there you were again :o)
It was around 4.30pm and I was standing behind the Asian guy that was giving you a hard time, waiting to be served. I think you were kind of fed up of him and wanted him to move on. Don't worry, he was also being a total pain in the vehicle pickup area.
You were wearing a gray blouse/shirt and had your hair kind of tied up. If you read this and want to make a new friend, drop me an email and let's chat. Maybe we can meet for a coffee at the Americana or something?
My Response:
How did you know my favorite mall of all time is the Americana?!!!! THE BEST part is-- it has a FOUNTAIN that reminds me of DISNEYLAND! CRAAAAAZY! Let's get Starbucks and sit by it!?!??! YA ? YA ? YA? Omigod - this is the most amazing plan ever in the universe. I can't wait. You made my night feel like a bed of roses.
I saw you working the service cash desk the other day and wanted to ask you out. But you were working and thought it was unprofessional to do so. But I came in today (02/12) to pickup my vehicle and there you were again :o)
It was around 4.30pm and I was standing behind the Asian guy that was giving you a hard time, waiting to be served. I think you were kind of fed up of him and wanted him to move on. Don't worry, he was also being a total pain in the vehicle pickup area.
You were wearing a gray blouse/shirt and had your hair kind of tied up. If you read this and want to make a new friend, drop me an email and let's chat. Maybe we can meet for a coffee at the Americana or something?
My Response:
How did you know my favorite mall of all time is the Americana?!!!! THE BEST part is-- it has a FOUNTAIN that reminds me of DISNEYLAND! CRAAAAAZY! Let's get Starbucks and sit by it!?!??! YA ? YA ? YA? Omigod - this is the most amazing plan ever in the universe. I can't wait. You made my night feel like a bed of roses.
"it's a bit like making sausages" - m4w - 34 (Miracle Mile)
Missed Connection:
I carried a big smile with me all day today, because I was so impressed that you remembered my name. Wow! What a pleasant surprise indeed :) How on earth did you remember? It's good to know the little people still have a place in corporate america, and I'll always be a gentelman and hold the door for you anytime. You're absolutely sweet "S." Thank you so much for being so nice to me. ...wish I could buy you a cup of coffee and talk sometime. It would be an utter miracle if you read this.
My Response:
Why would I forget your name ever? I don't have alzheimers. Also- I totally understood the analogy you gave comparing the demise of Hitler to making sausages. How are you a genius? Please teach me about the American Revolution and its comparison to World War 2 some more.
His Response:
Rice Girl,
Hitler... NO! lol. dork! It was a reference to producing the morning news.
Alessandra Rizzotti... wow, what an Italian. Both my parents were born in Sicily, though I was born in lovely Los Angeles. How bout you? Where in Italy are your parents from? By the way, I find it kind of funny that you're a microphone murdering MC, since I play bass guitar. Please see attached pics. Your name sounded really familiar, so I asked around the studio and a few different peeps said you're the shiznit with a mic in your hand. J/k. Thank god for myspace. lol.
How's life treating you? Where on the miracle mile do you work?
Tell me what led you to respond to my post.
-Massimo
My Response:
You know Stevie Wonder?!?!? Did you know he is blind????
His Response:
thats the reason i played bass for him. lol
and u totally ignored my email. meanie!
My Response:
I am actually a really nice person. Don't call me mean ever.
His Response:
oh i know, thats why i hold the door for ya :D
I carried a big smile with me all day today, because I was so impressed that you remembered my name. Wow! What a pleasant surprise indeed :) How on earth did you remember? It's good to know the little people still have a place in corporate america, and I'll always be a gentelman and hold the door for you anytime. You're absolutely sweet "S." Thank you so much for being so nice to me. ...wish I could buy you a cup of coffee and talk sometime. It would be an utter miracle if you read this.
My Response:
Why would I forget your name ever? I don't have alzheimers. Also- I totally understood the analogy you gave comparing the demise of Hitler to making sausages. How are you a genius? Please teach me about the American Revolution and its comparison to World War 2 some more.
His Response:
Rice Girl,
Hitler... NO! lol. dork! It was a reference to producing the morning news.
Alessandra Rizzotti... wow, what an Italian. Both my parents were born in Sicily, though I was born in lovely Los Angeles. How bout you? Where in Italy are your parents from? By the way, I find it kind of funny that you're a microphone murdering MC, since I play bass guitar. Please see attached pics. Your name sounded really familiar, so I asked around the studio and a few different peeps said you're the shiznit with a mic in your hand. J/k. Thank god for myspace. lol.
How's life treating you? Where on the miracle mile do you work?
Tell me what led you to respond to my post.
-Massimo
My Response:
You know Stevie Wonder?!?!? Did you know he is blind????
His Response:
thats the reason i played bass for him. lol
and u totally ignored my email. meanie!
My Response:
I am actually a really nice person. Don't call me mean ever.
His Response:
oh i know, thats why i hold the door for ya :D
Thursday
Willow you know who I am. I would love to be your boyfriend - m4w - 29 (Arcadia)
Missed Connection:
You siid you dated some guy and he didn't want to be your boyfriend.
Princess, you deserve so much better then drunks and losers. I will be with you.
I will give you any thing you want. Marry me , Marry me. I love every thing
about you. Even your bitchy attitude. Its a turn on.
My Response:
I will be with you forever and still give you nothing but a membership to LA Fitness. Still want me?
You siid you dated some guy and he didn't want to be your boyfriend.
Princess, you deserve so much better then drunks and losers. I will be with you.
I will give you any thing you want. Marry me , Marry me. I love every thing
about you. Even your bitchy attitude. Its a turn on.
My Response:
I will be with you forever and still give you nothing but a membership to LA Fitness. Still want me?
BEAR MOUNTAIN ON FRIDAY - m4w - 19 (909)
Missed Connections:
YOU WERE PROBABLY A BEGINNER TRYING TO SNOWBOARD BECAUSE WHEN I SAW YOU TWICE YOU WERE SITTING ON YOUR BUTT. YOU WERE HISPANIC AND I WAS GONNA COME TALK TO YOU RIGHT AFTER I WAS ON THE LIFT. THEN YOU LEFT. TELL ME WHAT COLOR PANTS YOU WERE WEARING
My Response:
I'm such a beginner at snow activities- I sit on my butt everytime I snowboard- my fellow cholos call me a LOSER! Whatever, though. I have hot pink pants. Take them off.
YOU WERE PROBABLY A BEGINNER TRYING TO SNOWBOARD BECAUSE WHEN I SAW YOU TWICE YOU WERE SITTING ON YOUR BUTT. YOU WERE HISPANIC AND I WAS GONNA COME TALK TO YOU RIGHT AFTER I WAS ON THE LIFT. THEN YOU LEFT. TELL ME WHAT COLOR PANTS YOU WERE WEARING
My Response:
I'm such a beginner at snow activities- I sit on my butt everytime I snowboard- my fellow cholos call me a LOSER! Whatever, though. I have hot pink pants. Take them off.
to the appropriate authorities You call yourself "Super Yummy Goddess" -- and you are - m4w
Missed Connection:
After LA decompression, met you in your bikini, which really popped in the black lights of that party pad. You're the Super Yummy Goddess -- but I never got to ask you if you're the type of goddess who commands those around her to fall to their knees in worship, or if you're the type of goddess who needs to be chained down to Earth.
Anyway... would like to start a new friendship.
My Response:
I love dancing in the street and pretending I am at Burningman again. I could do it everyday. I could also let you worship me all day (if you call yourself Zeus the master). Get back to me. I want to drive a Mercedes run on veggie oil with you.
After LA decompression, met you in your bikini, which really popped in the black lights of that party pad. You're the Super Yummy Goddess -- but I never got to ask you if you're the type of goddess who commands those around her to fall to their knees in worship, or if you're the type of goddess who needs to be chained down to Earth.
Anyway... would like to start a new friendship.
My Response:
I love dancing in the street and pretending I am at Burningman again. I could do it everyday. I could also let you worship me all day (if you call yourself Zeus the master). Get back to me. I want to drive a Mercedes run on veggie oil with you.
tallish brunette, at Borders Cafe this morning? Nissan Altima? 11am - m4w - 38 (Manhattan Beach)
Missed Connection:
you are gorgeous..
we had a few minutes of "small talk"
but had wanted more....
wondering if you did to?
My Response:
Were you stalking me? It seems like you followed me from the cafe to my Nissan Altima. Normally, I would be totally weirded out, but I'm stalking you right now.
you are gorgeous..
we had a few minutes of "small talk"
but had wanted more....
wondering if you did to?
My Response:
Were you stalking me? It seems like you followed me from the cafe to my Nissan Altima. Normally, I would be totally weirded out, but I'm stalking you right now.
Tuesday
I love you... - m4w (westside)
Missed Connection:
I just wish you did not toss me away like yesterdays trash. It would have been nice to see you every once in a while. I have no designs on your time, space, or anything... I just wanted to be able to love you every now and then.
I'm not ready for the 'let's get married' thing anyway.
So tell me little girl... Why does affection scare you away?
My Response:
Honestly- that picture reminds me that yes, I am an EPIC FAILURE and can never take care of people, myself, or things (like my dead dog Amber).
I just wish you did not toss me away like yesterdays trash. It would have been nice to see you every once in a while. I have no designs on your time, space, or anything... I just wanted to be able to love you every now and then.
I'm not ready for the 'let's get married' thing anyway.
So tell me little girl... Why does affection scare you away?
My Response:
Honestly- that picture reminds me that yes, I am an EPIC FAILURE and can never take care of people, myself, or things (like my dead dog Amber).
are you lonely?????? - m4w - 42 (San gabriel )
Missed Connection:
come and join me for a beutyfull rainny day in san gabriel mail me soon please the sooner you so the sooner we get together see you -no spam plese
My Response:
Candles are just what I need right now. With the rain and the economy going to shit- candles will sure put an end to all my worries. I'm coming over as soon as you give me an address- that's how bad I need to be around dim lighting... possibly a glass of merlot? Please tell me you like classical music.. I don't have high expectations, though. Afterall, you are a terrible wordsmith.
His Reponse:
well thatnnk you for being sincere I like that you seem real so here I go i am in sangabriel and I love to meet you soon sorry it took me so long to get back and even if it is not rainning I hope you still want to come see you soon 323 868-2216 here is my picture I hope you like it and send me yours please see you
My Response:
Awesome. 818) 826-5309
come and join me for a beutyfull rainny day in san gabriel mail me soon please the sooner you so the sooner we get together see you -no spam plese
My Response:
Candles are just what I need right now. With the rain and the economy going to shit- candles will sure put an end to all my worries. I'm coming over as soon as you give me an address- that's how bad I need to be around dim lighting... possibly a glass of merlot? Please tell me you like classical music.. I don't have high expectations, though. Afterall, you are a terrible wordsmith.
His Reponse:
well thatnnk you for being sincere I like that you seem real so here I go i am in sangabriel and I love to meet you soon sorry it took me so long to get back and even if it is not rainning I hope you still want to come see you soon 323 868-2216 here is my picture I hope you like it and send me yours please see you
My Response:
Awesome. 818) 826-5309
Blonde at PF Changs today, lunchtime^^^^^^^ - m4w - 30 (Sherman Oaks Galleria)
Missed Connection:
pf chang's at sherman oaks galleria
you were sitting diagonally across from me, I didn't want to disturb your lunch by telling you that I thought you were just incredibly beautiful SO instead I just bought your lunch and had the waiter drop my business card.. in the moment I didnt write my cell number on the card..ha ha . anyway hopefully you see this and maybe I could buy you dinner?
My Reponse:
You were so right to leave your business card. I googled you...it's crazy that you're some kind of lawyer! I can't even pay for a movie these days....so you paying for my dinner??.....wow....you must be big.... Wanna go to a slasher flick sometime? Something chill? I can't really date right now- but I need to see movies where people die (it's for an anthropology class I'm taking). Let me know if you're interested!
pf chang's at sherman oaks galleria
you were sitting diagonally across from me, I didn't want to disturb your lunch by telling you that I thought you were just incredibly beautiful SO instead I just bought your lunch and had the waiter drop my business card.. in the moment I didnt write my cell number on the card..ha ha . anyway hopefully you see this and maybe I could buy you dinner?
My Reponse:
You were so right to leave your business card. I googled you...it's crazy that you're some kind of lawyer! I can't even pay for a movie these days....so you paying for my dinner??.....wow....you must be big.... Wanna go to a slasher flick sometime? Something chill? I can't really date right now- but I need to see movies where people die (it's for an anthropology class I'm taking). Let me know if you're interested!
Chipotle / Marina Del Ray - m4w
Missed Connection:
you: platinum blonde with white jacket and leggings at Chipotle in Marina Del Ray today around 4:30pm with your friend who was wearing a Washington DC hoodie. We made eye contact a couple times. If you see this and you're interested get back to me.
My Response:
Seriously- all I have to say is- how could I NOT notice you at Chipotle in Marina Del Rey? You were so fucking hot! I can't believe this is happening. I swear I was so impressed that you ordered a vegetarian burrito. You don't even know. I was like- he looks ghetto (like not in a bad way)- but then he's ordering VEGETARIAN??? Like- who does that? I wore leggings that day and I never do that- so maybe you ordered veggie burrito that day and you never do that too, but for some reason you wanted to impress me like how I cosmically wanted to impress you (indirectly)? Who knows? I am so amazed by the universe right now- you can't even imagine how amazed. Man- Marina Del Rey- what a hot place to be physically attracted to a way physically attractive person. It makes me want to go surfing, ya know???
you: platinum blonde with white jacket and leggings at Chipotle in Marina Del Ray today around 4:30pm with your friend who was wearing a Washington DC hoodie. We made eye contact a couple times. If you see this and you're interested get back to me.
My Response:
Seriously- all I have to say is- how could I NOT notice you at Chipotle in Marina Del Rey? You were so fucking hot! I can't believe this is happening. I swear I was so impressed that you ordered a vegetarian burrito. You don't even know. I was like- he looks ghetto (like not in a bad way)- but then he's ordering VEGETARIAN??? Like- who does that? I wore leggings that day and I never do that- so maybe you ordered veggie burrito that day and you never do that too, but for some reason you wanted to impress me like how I cosmically wanted to impress you (indirectly)? Who knows? I am so amazed by the universe right now- you can't even imagine how amazed. Man- Marina Del Rey- what a hot place to be physically attracted to a way physically attractive person. It makes me want to go surfing, ya know???
Sunday
Westin hotel downtown, Friday 4 pm. - m4w - 45 (Downtown LA)
Missed Connection:
You were looking for the lobby bar; I assured you you were already there.
I would do anything to see you again....
My Response:
Omigod- I'm so dumb sometimes when it comes to directions! LOL. Well- I totally like sorta live at the Westin right now. I go to the bar every night just to escape the shit, ya know? Meet me there sometime and we can totally chat- and like, maybe hit it off? I love a man in uniform. You were the bell boy, right?
His Response:
Just so I'm sure it's you: what were you wearing that day in the bar?
thanks
My Response:
A black see-through long sleeve shirt...American Apparel knee high socks...a choker..black eyeliner...I'm kinda hardcore...
His Response:
Hmmm... interesting... this sounds sort of like the woman i spoke with, but sort of not.... one more question: what's your hair style?
and, by the way, no, i'm not the bell boy... i was sitting at a little table between the bar and the fountain and you (or someone else) noticed me smiling at you and asked me for directions.
My Reponse:
There was a fountain!?! Near the Bar??! I am like so oblivious sometimes- and I LIVE there!
His Reponse:
what were you holding in your hands? and what is your hairstyle? :-)
My Response:
I don't like holding things- not even other people's hands...so...I don't think I was holding anything..my hair was way shitty looking too.
His Reponse:
i don't think you're the woman i saw. but you sound charming and gorgeous. so, yes, we should definitely meet up at the Westin (or elsewhere) sometime!
should we exchange photos?
My Response:
OK.
You were looking for the lobby bar; I assured you you were already there.
I would do anything to see you again....
My Response:
Omigod- I'm so dumb sometimes when it comes to directions! LOL. Well- I totally like sorta live at the Westin right now. I go to the bar every night just to escape the shit, ya know? Meet me there sometime and we can totally chat- and like, maybe hit it off? I love a man in uniform. You were the bell boy, right?
His Response:
Just so I'm sure it's you: what were you wearing that day in the bar?
thanks
My Response:
A black see-through long sleeve shirt...American Apparel knee high socks...a choker..black eyeliner...I'm kinda hardcore...
His Response:
Hmmm... interesting... this sounds sort of like the woman i spoke with, but sort of not.... one more question: what's your hair style?
and, by the way, no, i'm not the bell boy... i was sitting at a little table between the bar and the fountain and you (or someone else) noticed me smiling at you and asked me for directions.
My Reponse:
There was a fountain!?! Near the Bar??! I am like so oblivious sometimes- and I LIVE there!
His Reponse:
what were you holding in your hands? and what is your hairstyle? :-)
My Response:
I don't like holding things- not even other people's hands...so...I don't think I was holding anything..my hair was way shitty looking too.
His Reponse:
i don't think you're the woman i saw. but you sound charming and gorgeous. so, yes, we should definitely meet up at the Westin (or elsewhere) sometime!
should we exchange photos?
My Response:
OK.
Hottie at RAGE last night - m4w - 22
Missed Connection:
You and your super fine friends looked like the only straight people in the club last night. You were wearing a plaid yellow scarf and and had long shiny hair with a little comb-over action. Damn lil mama, you fine.
holla back.
My Response:
How did you know I was straight? Just by my scarf and hairstyle? That's dumb- because I am Bi.....but NOT Bi for you. Jee. Get it straight--- appearance ain't gonna say nothin about your sexuality.
You and your super fine friends looked like the only straight people in the club last night. You were wearing a plaid yellow scarf and and had long shiny hair with a little comb-over action. Damn lil mama, you fine.
holla back.
My Response:
How did you know I was straight? Just by my scarf and hairstyle? That's dumb- because I am Bi.....but NOT Bi for you. Jee. Get it straight--- appearance ain't gonna say nothin about your sexuality.
must love curry - m4w - 69 (india)
Missed Connection:
* Location: india
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
My Response:
Are you really from India and I can't contact you with other commercial interests? What about talking about masala? Can I do that? You say I must love curry---Do I have to cook it? Is your requirement that I make the curry for you and that is why you are asking? If so- I don't know how to make anything other than curry- so is that a problem? I am desperate for your sex.
His Response (notarealdr):
That's a much more detailed response that I can ever ask for. Actually it was a missed connection, someone from my past. Past life perhaps? I don't know, maybe. Could it have been a curry chef in a small Indian cafe in Niagara? Or maybe I'm searching for a woman who ordered yellow chicken curry togo from Sunset Thai - back in the day when Sunset Thai was called "Thai Beer".
On the other hand, maybe the missed connection is with an attitude. A spicy, wet attitude.
Could curry be a code word for something else? Something bigger? Something beyond it's literal meaning. Maybe it's a type of existentialism of the word I'm looking for. Curry will find me, not that I will find she who loves curry.
My Response:
You are way earthy/into yoga aren't you? I wikipediaed an analogy for "curry" and all it said was : The word "kari" has its origins in Classical Tamil and means "vegetable in sauce" or "sauce" --- so are you calling yourself a "vegetable in sauce"?
His Response:
No.
His Response (after an hour of me not responding):
My long emails were not of interest to you, so I decided to not scare you off with philosophy.
My Response:
Oh ok. Ya- I don't think I am smart enough for you. But- I love smart men.
His Response:
What other qualities do you look for in a guy?
My Response:
Definitely a love of curry.
His Reponse (four days later):
main reason I'm writing you back is that you said in your first email to me, that you were desperate for my sex.
so how are you this week?
* Location: india
* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
My Response:
Are you really from India and I can't contact you with other commercial interests? What about talking about masala? Can I do that? You say I must love curry---Do I have to cook it? Is your requirement that I make the curry for you and that is why you are asking? If so- I don't know how to make anything other than curry- so is that a problem? I am desperate for your sex.
His Response (notarealdr):
That's a much more detailed response that I can ever ask for. Actually it was a missed connection, someone from my past. Past life perhaps? I don't know, maybe. Could it have been a curry chef in a small Indian cafe in Niagara? Or maybe I'm searching for a woman who ordered yellow chicken curry togo from Sunset Thai - back in the day when Sunset Thai was called "Thai Beer".
On the other hand, maybe the missed connection is with an attitude. A spicy, wet attitude.
Could curry be a code word for something else? Something bigger? Something beyond it's literal meaning. Maybe it's a type of existentialism of the word I'm looking for. Curry will find me, not that I will find she who loves curry.
My Response:
You are way earthy/into yoga aren't you? I wikipediaed an analogy for "curry" and all it said was : The word "kari" has its origins in Classical Tamil and means "vegetable in sauce" or "sauce" --- so are you calling yourself a "vegetable in sauce"?
His Response:
No.
His Response (after an hour of me not responding):
My long emails were not of interest to you, so I decided to not scare you off with philosophy.
My Response:
Oh ok. Ya- I don't think I am smart enough for you. But- I love smart men.
His Response:
What other qualities do you look for in a guy?
My Response:
Definitely a love of curry.
His Reponse (four days later):
main reason I'm writing you back is that you said in your first email to me, that you were desperate for my sex.
so how are you this week?
howl at the moon lady - m4w (Pasadena)
Missed Connection:
hi hope you get this i was the one you took a pic of me with you and we talked outside if you get this give me a shout you are hot
My Response:
I didn't ask you to take the Sony Cybershot MEGAPIXEL 8.0 out of my hands to take a picture with me and my bangin' new weave! You did that without askin- which shows you have no manners, MR. ! (lol JKJK$&@@^) I enjoyed talking about Obama with you- but I enjoy talking about Obama with anyone- so don't feel so special. Besides, I hate Howl at the Moon. Are we wolves or somethin? (LOL-jkjk). But ya- seriously- I never go that howl place. I was only there for my sister Tanesha's friend's best friend's bday...so if that's your regular hangout- you're a loooosahhh. Kiddin-- I'm playin', player. But ya- I dunno- not sure if I was into your getup. You had a FUBU hat...(out of style- out of mind (MY mind, that is!!!)
His Reponse:
so do you still have the pic of us and may i see it?
no i dont go there alot only go there maybe once a year.
i am not sure if you remeber me or not i was the blond i was not wearing a hat lol:)
My Response:
Oh wait-- so you were this guy...??? I didn't take no picture with a blonde guy- but that's my cousin Sherri.
hi hope you get this i was the one you took a pic of me with you and we talked outside if you get this give me a shout you are hot
My Response:
I didn't ask you to take the Sony Cybershot MEGAPIXEL 8.0 out of my hands to take a picture with me and my bangin' new weave! You did that without askin- which shows you have no manners, MR. ! (lol JKJK$&@@^) I enjoyed talking about Obama with you- but I enjoy talking about Obama with anyone- so don't feel so special. Besides, I hate Howl at the Moon. Are we wolves or somethin? (LOL-jkjk). But ya- seriously- I never go that howl place. I was only there for my sister Tanesha's friend's best friend's bday...so if that's your regular hangout- you're a loooosahhh. Kiddin-- I'm playin', player. But ya- I dunno- not sure if I was into your getup. You had a FUBU hat...(out of style- out of mind (MY mind, that is!!!)
His Reponse:
so do you still have the pic of us and may i see it?
no i dont go there alot only go there maybe once a year.
i am not sure if you remeber me or not i was the blond i was not wearing a hat lol:)
My Response:
Oh wait-- so you were this guy...??? I didn't take no picture with a blonde guy- but that's my cousin Sherri.
Thursday
D - m4w - 48
Missed Connection:
You laugh you cry you live you die.
My Response:
You are a true philosopher. It turns my fingers on.
You laugh you cry you live you die.
My Response:
You are a true philosopher. It turns my fingers on.
Your name is JOY.... - m4w
Missed Connection:
Hi there,
Your name is Joy, your last name begins with an "N". You are a big, beautiful girl...
I just want you to know, I'm your lumberjack.
My Response:
Does that make me your log?
The Response From The Real "Joy":
Yes, my name is JOY! And yes, I do love you. Making me cry AGAIN, are you? I haven't heard from you this whole time. You know where I work. I gave you ALL my contact information. For heaven's sake, you're friends with the top level executive at my work whose name I couldn't even remember! It's not as if you couldn't just drive up to the building, walk in and ask for me. Want to keep it a secret? The receptionist is my friend, and not a chatterbox. Don't worry.
I don't know how to reach you or where to find you, yet I have in my heart this immense aching for you. I can imagine loving you and only you, K, yet what can I do about the fact that YOU haven't contacted ME? Am I to live forever in the hope that you will call? Do you want me to remain immersed in this pain of unrequited love? I suggested we be just friends for awhile, leaving the physical intimacy out of the picture until you found your way clear of living with your current girlfriend. I said in all fairness that I didn't expect you to date only me after you broke up with her. I said I would always love you, and I meant it. I said "I love you, too" and I meant it. I am not the type, however, to demand immediate commitment from you, but I will accept it if that's what you want to give me, because, you know what, honey? I am now and have been totally and completely committed to you since that very night we met. I am ALL yours. As a matter of fact, I believe I've been ALL yours since the beginning of time, but that's my belief. I'm all ethereal that way (and you know it).
So, come by the office today, tomorrow or sometime next week and let's go somewhere -- to the beach or something, where we can just hold hands. I think it's ok that we hold hands. Friends hold hands. But if you're still living with her I can't kiss you. I can hold you, I can hug you, but I can't kiss you. It's not that I don't want to -- it's that I can't because to imagine that you will then be going home and kissing her is just too much for me to bear. She's living with you. To me, she's therefore your wife. Married or not, and I know you're not "married" -- she's your wife!
You have no competition for my heart, but not hearing from you tells me that maybe you don't want me. Do you really want me? Then, please, let's see one another just a little bit. Just enough to nurture what's there. Let me see your sweet face. Let me see your smile. If you're not still with her, then let's see one another more than that.
I love you, K. I'd shout it from the rooftop of this very building if I thought you'd hear it.
My Reponse to Joy:
You are so lucky to be in love with a lumberjack.
Hi there,
Your name is Joy, your last name begins with an "N". You are a big, beautiful girl...
I just want you to know, I'm your lumberjack.
My Response:
Does that make me your log?
The Response From The Real "Joy":
Yes, my name is JOY! And yes, I do love you. Making me cry AGAIN, are you? I haven't heard from you this whole time. You know where I work. I gave you ALL my contact information. For heaven's sake, you're friends with the top level executive at my work whose name I couldn't even remember! It's not as if you couldn't just drive up to the building, walk in and ask for me. Want to keep it a secret? The receptionist is my friend, and not a chatterbox. Don't worry.
I don't know how to reach you or where to find you, yet I have in my heart this immense aching for you. I can imagine loving you and only you, K, yet what can I do about the fact that YOU haven't contacted ME? Am I to live forever in the hope that you will call? Do you want me to remain immersed in this pain of unrequited love? I suggested we be just friends for awhile, leaving the physical intimacy out of the picture until you found your way clear of living with your current girlfriend. I said in all fairness that I didn't expect you to date only me after you broke up with her. I said I would always love you, and I meant it. I said "I love you, too" and I meant it. I am not the type, however, to demand immediate commitment from you, but I will accept it if that's what you want to give me, because, you know what, honey? I am now and have been totally and completely committed to you since that very night we met. I am ALL yours. As a matter of fact, I believe I've been ALL yours since the beginning of time, but that's my belief. I'm all ethereal that way (and you know it).
So, come by the office today, tomorrow or sometime next week and let's go somewhere -- to the beach or something, where we can just hold hands. I think it's ok that we hold hands. Friends hold hands. But if you're still living with her I can't kiss you. I can hold you, I can hug you, but I can't kiss you. It's not that I don't want to -- it's that I can't because to imagine that you will then be going home and kissing her is just too much for me to bear. She's living with you. To me, she's therefore your wife. Married or not, and I know you're not "married" -- she's your wife!
You have no competition for my heart, but not hearing from you tells me that maybe you don't want me. Do you really want me? Then, please, let's see one another just a little bit. Just enough to nurture what's there. Let me see your sweet face. Let me see your smile. If you're not still with her, then let's see one another more than that.
I love you, K. I'd shout it from the rooftop of this very building if I thought you'd hear it.
My Reponse to Joy:
You are so lucky to be in love with a lumberjack.
sappy lover - m4w
Missed Connection:
I'm sorry, but just the image of your eyes,
sends my heart to flutter
I feel that I've held you in my heart a thousand years
I held you in my arms a thousand times
You have inspired me then,
and you inspire now...
My Love... My Muse...My Sweet Sweet darling K
My Response:
The image of your eyes
Gives me asthma
I feel that I've held you in my heart
Only because you kept living in my apartment
Get out of my room!
You inspire me to punch walls
I would kill your goldfish if I had a chance.
My Swiss Army Knife...Your Gadgets...My Plan: Destruction
Let the force be with me (not you)...
I'm sorry, but just the image of your eyes,
sends my heart to flutter
I feel that I've held you in my heart a thousand years
I held you in my arms a thousand times
You have inspired me then,
and you inspire now...
My Love... My Muse...My Sweet Sweet darling K
My Response:
The image of your eyes
Gives me asthma
I feel that I've held you in my heart
Only because you kept living in my apartment
Get out of my room!
You inspire me to punch walls
I would kill your goldfish if I had a chance.
My Swiss Army Knife...Your Gadgets...My Plan: Destruction
Let the force be with me (not you)...
Gorgeous asian woman driving a blue civic coupe m4w - 26 (Silverlake)
Missed Connection:
You were a beautiful asian woman driving a blue honda civic coupe heading towards Silverlake Blvd from London St.. We bought caught eyes. I was the filipino guy parking. I just wanted to say hi and maybe chat over some coffee at starbucks. I doubt you'll read this just wanted to say that youre really beautiful. If you read this just let me know what color my car was. Hmm what are the chances? Oh well
My Response:
Your car was like a shitty aqua color, right!?!? I guess I would get coffee with you at Starbucks, but only if you buy me a Frappucino with whole milk and extra caramel. Whatever though- let's go to Koreatown instead. I like Boba...Starbucks is WHATEVER! LOL! Ok- here's my number: 818) 556-2345. I tutor at Kumon on Olympic and Sawtelle. We could also SAKI BOMB if ya want, but WHATEVER!!!! LOL jkjkjkjk! :) :) ;) (B ^)
His Response:
lol um wow got a name?
His Response 2 seconds After:
Got a picture? lol
My Response (after Googling Gorgeous Asian Woman):
Guess which one! I am The Hottest!
His Response:
Good try
My Response:
Damnit :)!
His Response:
Smarter than your average bear pretty funny though I could gather a lot more information but i'm not mean lol good night
My Response:
I'm just a kidder :) good night! i hope you find her! :)
His Response:
lol probably wont oh well nite nite so are you in silverlake or beverly hills just curious because pretty close on the color lol
You were a beautiful asian woman driving a blue honda civic coupe heading towards Silverlake Blvd from London St.. We bought caught eyes. I was the filipino guy parking. I just wanted to say hi and maybe chat over some coffee at starbucks. I doubt you'll read this just wanted to say that youre really beautiful. If you read this just let me know what color my car was. Hmm what are the chances? Oh well
My Response:
Your car was like a shitty aqua color, right!?!? I guess I would get coffee with you at Starbucks, but only if you buy me a Frappucino with whole milk and extra caramel. Whatever though- let's go to Koreatown instead. I like Boba...Starbucks is WHATEVER! LOL! Ok- here's my number: 818) 556-2345. I tutor at Kumon on Olympic and Sawtelle. We could also SAKI BOMB if ya want, but WHATEVER!!!! LOL jkjkjkjk! :) :) ;) (B ^)
His Response:
lol um wow got a name?
His Response 2 seconds After:
Got a picture? lol
My Response (after Googling Gorgeous Asian Woman):
Guess which one! I am The Hottest!
His Response:
Good try
My Response:
Damnit :)!
His Response:
Smarter than your average bear pretty funny though I could gather a lot more information but i'm not mean lol good night
My Response:
I'm just a kidder :) good night! i hope you find her! :)
His Response:
lol probably wont oh well nite nite so are you in silverlake or beverly hills just curious because pretty close on the color lol
Wednesday
Silent bookstore synchrony & seduction... - m4w - 42 (west LA)
Missed Connection:
Wonderfully unexpected and seductive experience that happened... love
to have it happen again.
Maybe with you.
Shapely seductive woman... sitting across from me in overstuffed chair. Both reading. Over time, gradually...
Nonverbal communication volume: turning up.
Body language: close reciprocal sync.
Curves revealing sundress -- lightly caressing your leg, leg rhythmically rocking, "accidentally" revealed glimpses of your cleavage and thighs. Sheer underwear / lacy bra.
Obvious mutual interest. I tented. Your headlights turned on.
Deeper breathing.
Regained composure. Repeated, and then repeated again... throbbing with unanticipated intrigue...
I asked her to follow me to a more private area.
She read her book aloud to me, which I held above
her lap while we sat cross-legged on the floor.
Under the book, my fingers began to explore, slowly.
She tried to continue to read normally. Others were
nearby... her voice was in a whisper, halting, unsteady,
quivering. The skin on her chest turned red.
She won't find this -- I'll never see her again.
But your curiosity bought you here.
But you if can relate... let's set up
an accidental rendezvous...
My Response:
Are you a poet? Or trying to be? I saw you in the bookstore, but now that I know your style is like some kind of bad romance novel, I'm much less attracted. It would suit you way better to seduce a dumb stripper. I'd actually prefer to "turn down" our "Nonverbal communication volume" so that it stays "nonverbal" forever. I would never want to engage in deep breathing with you- not even in yoga...
Wonderfully unexpected and seductive experience that happened... love
to have it happen again.
Maybe with you.
Shapely seductive woman... sitting across from me in overstuffed chair. Both reading. Over time, gradually...
Nonverbal communication volume: turning up.
Body language: close reciprocal sync.
Curves revealing sundress -- lightly caressing your leg, leg rhythmically rocking, "accidentally" revealed glimpses of your cleavage and thighs. Sheer underwear / lacy bra.
Obvious mutual interest. I tented. Your headlights turned on.
Deeper breathing.
Regained composure. Repeated, and then repeated again... throbbing with unanticipated intrigue...
I asked her to follow me to a more private area.
She read her book aloud to me, which I held above
her lap while we sat cross-legged on the floor.
Under the book, my fingers began to explore, slowly.
She tried to continue to read normally. Others were
nearby... her voice was in a whisper, halting, unsteady,
quivering. The skin on her chest turned red.
She won't find this -- I'll never see her again.
But your curiosity bought you here.
But you if can relate... let's set up
an accidental rendezvous...
My Response:
Are you a poet? Or trying to be? I saw you in the bookstore, but now that I know your style is like some kind of bad romance novel, I'm much less attracted. It would suit you way better to seduce a dumb stripper. I'd actually prefer to "turn down" our "Nonverbal communication volume" so that it stays "nonverbal" forever. I would never want to engage in deep breathing with you- not even in yoga...
COMPTON COURTHOUSE - m4w - 36 (COMPTON)
Missed Connection:
Hi. You are young hispanic girl. YOU WERE THE JUROR. beautiful. the eye contact. i know we had a connection. it's okay. i don't blame you at all. i don't have a record and i prob won't go to jail so it's cool anyway. if i can meet you it would have all been worth it. it felt like love at first sight to me. to you? you said so much to me through your eyes... especially when you were leaving; you were telling me that you tried for me; i know. please email me. if it's you; tell me some info so i know its you; what you were wearing that last day; i remember. and what # you were.
My Response:
Now I am scared you are stalking ME, pendeja. I DID fight for you to not get a restraining order in that case because I thought you were sexy, but now I am not so sure about you since you know my number and eye color and shit. Whatever, though...love can be found anywhere, right? I once dated a former rapist. Anyways- check you lata!
Hi. You are young hispanic girl. YOU WERE THE JUROR. beautiful. the eye contact. i know we had a connection. it's okay. i don't blame you at all. i don't have a record and i prob won't go to jail so it's cool anyway. if i can meet you it would have all been worth it. it felt like love at first sight to me. to you? you said so much to me through your eyes... especially when you were leaving; you were telling me that you tried for me; i know. please email me. if it's you; tell me some info so i know its you; what you were wearing that last day; i remember. and what # you were.
My Response:
Now I am scared you are stalking ME, pendeja. I DID fight for you to not get a restraining order in that case because I thought you were sexy, but now I am not so sure about you since you know my number and eye color and shit. Whatever, though...love can be found anywhere, right? I once dated a former rapist. Anyways- check you lata!
"I want SEX" - m4w
Missed Connection:
iT'S PRETTY FUNNY THAT YOU OPENED THIS..........because in the next seven days you will:
* have sex
* have someone fall in love with you
* find money you've been missing
* your luck will change for the better in all areas... love, happiness, job, money
BUT...first you will have to re-post this with 1 of these titles:
"i lost my Virginity"
"Fuck I Did"
"I'm a lesbian"
''im gay''
"I'M HORNY"
"fuck you bitch! and i hope your ugly ass reads this!"
"WE GOT ARRESTED"
"I'M Anorexic"
"Just to settle all the rumors...yes I am pregnant"
"I'm getting married!"
"My dad got the job!.. I'm moving to Japan!"
"Guess who i kissed yesterday!"
"I'm gonna be a daddy!"
"I'm moving back!!!!!"
"friend fucking stealler"
"I'm moving!!!"
"I miss her"
"i smoke weed everyday of the week"
"I miss him"
"I want SEX"
"I might be getting locked up!"
"I got married last night!!!"
BEWARE IF YOU DON'T RE-POST THIS YOU WILL HAVE BAD LUCK
My Response:
Omigod! You SO tricked me! I guess I'll have to repost this with the subject line: "fuck you bitch! and i hope your ugly ass reads this!" Then, will I have sex within seven days? Guaranteed?
iT'S PRETTY FUNNY THAT YOU OPENED THIS..........because in the next seven days you will:
* have sex
* have someone fall in love with you
* find money you've been missing
* your luck will change for the better in all areas... love, happiness, job, money
BUT...first you will have to re-post this with 1 of these titles:
"i lost my Virginity"
"Fuck I Did"
"I'm a lesbian"
''im gay''
"I'M HORNY"
"fuck you bitch! and i hope your ugly ass reads this!"
"WE GOT ARRESTED"
"I'M Anorexic"
"Just to settle all the rumors...yes I am pregnant"
"I'm getting married!"
"My dad got the job!.. I'm moving to Japan!"
"Guess who i kissed yesterday!"
"I'm gonna be a daddy!"
"I'm moving back!!!!!"
"friend fucking stealler"
"I'm moving!!!"
"I miss her"
"i smoke weed everyday of the week"
"I miss him"
"I want SEX"
"I might be getting locked up!"
"I got married last night!!!"
BEWARE IF YOU DON'T RE-POST THIS YOU WILL HAVE BAD LUCK
My Response:
Omigod! You SO tricked me! I guess I'll have to repost this with the subject line: "fuck you bitch! and i hope your ugly ass reads this!" Then, will I have sex within seven days? Guaranteed?
Is your name Mandy Moore? - m4w - 24 (SF Valley)
Missed Connection:
I'm an EMT and the other day I was checking out a couple people who got into an accident at Los Feliz and Fern Dell at Griffith Park. Right when we got back into the ambulance after finding out that everyone was okay a car pulled up next to us and the girl driving asked me if it was okay for her to make a right around us and the crashed car. I told her it was fine and she said thank you and pulled away. Just then I realized that this young lady was in fact Mandy Moore. So if you happen to be Mandy Moore and you're reading this right now I just wanted to say...HEY! YOU'RE MANDY MOORE AREN'T YOU?!?
P.S. You're gorgeous too.
My Response:
Did you seriously have to blow my cover as a polite human being and very considerate driver just now? Don't sell this to the press- ok???
I'm an EMT and the other day I was checking out a couple people who got into an accident at Los Feliz and Fern Dell at Griffith Park. Right when we got back into the ambulance after finding out that everyone was okay a car pulled up next to us and the girl driving asked me if it was okay for her to make a right around us and the crashed car. I told her it was fine and she said thank you and pulled away. Just then I realized that this young lady was in fact Mandy Moore. So if you happen to be Mandy Moore and you're reading this right now I just wanted to say...HEY! YOU'RE MANDY MOORE AREN'T YOU?!?
P.S. You're gorgeous too.
My Response:
Did you seriously have to blow my cover as a polite human being and very considerate driver just now? Don't sell this to the press- ok???
Ralph's On 3rd/La Brea... You're That Hot Older Woman In Low Cut Dress - m4w - 42 (Hancock Park)
Missed Connection:
I'm pretty sure you didn't see me, but you were the HOTTEST woman in the market! You were in a low cut, brown dress that showed off your amazing cleavage and short enough to show off your luscious legs! You weren't using a basket, just carrying items when I saw you. Tried to flirt, but couldn't keep up with you. Crossing my fingers you read this. I'm fun, cute, sensuous and would love to flirt with you!
My Response:
Considering there were only geriatric folks at Ralph's, duh I was the hottest one there! But ya- I am TOTALLY luscious and big breasted! DUH DUH DUH! You'll never be able to keep up with me - so just keep trying, you little man. Get in line (winks hearts hearts!)
His Response:
On that particular day there happened to be some sexy younger women at Ralph's (an odditiy for sure), but you still stood out, head and shoulders (and boobs) above the rest! And I'll keep up with you just fine... I'm UP for the challenge!
Lanny xoxoxo
My Response:
I don't remember younger ladies in the store. But maybe you are 95 and consider 85 young?
His Reponse:
There's still a good chance you're her. By young ladies in the store, I was only referring to two who rushed through the aisles and split. They had nothing on you.... if that was indeed you. If it wasn't, I'm still intrigued by you.... as you are obviously a confident, sensuous and sexy mature woman. We can always agree to pass each other in the aisle and make it official!
Lanny
His Response without Another Reponse of Mine:
You have all the delicious delicacies of a high end, tasty gourmet market!
My Response:
I was buying organic tampons...
His Response:
Good to know you go organic. I'm hoping sometime soon we can go au natural! lol...
L
His Response (on Valentine's Day....way long after his post):
Hi and Happy Valentine's Day! I may have had the wrong woman, bt just thought I'd take a chance to see if you might be all by your lonesome today. Perhaps, if you are, we might chat, meet for a coffee or drink and see where things take us? Or we could meet at Ralph's and flirt in the aisles.
carey
I'm pretty sure you didn't see me, but you were the HOTTEST woman in the market! You were in a low cut, brown dress that showed off your amazing cleavage and short enough to show off your luscious legs! You weren't using a basket, just carrying items when I saw you. Tried to flirt, but couldn't keep up with you. Crossing my fingers you read this. I'm fun, cute, sensuous and would love to flirt with you!
My Response:
Considering there were only geriatric folks at Ralph's, duh I was the hottest one there! But ya- I am TOTALLY luscious and big breasted! DUH DUH DUH! You'll never be able to keep up with me - so just keep trying, you little man. Get in line (winks hearts hearts!)
His Response:
On that particular day there happened to be some sexy younger women at Ralph's (an odditiy for sure), but you still stood out, head and shoulders (and boobs) above the rest! And I'll keep up with you just fine... I'm UP for the challenge!
Lanny xoxoxo
My Response:
I don't remember younger ladies in the store. But maybe you are 95 and consider 85 young?
His Reponse:
There's still a good chance you're her. By young ladies in the store, I was only referring to two who rushed through the aisles and split. They had nothing on you.... if that was indeed you. If it wasn't, I'm still intrigued by you.... as you are obviously a confident, sensuous and sexy mature woman. We can always agree to pass each other in the aisle and make it official!
Lanny
His Response without Another Reponse of Mine:
You have all the delicious delicacies of a high end, tasty gourmet market!
My Response:
I was buying organic tampons...
His Response:
Good to know you go organic. I'm hoping sometime soon we can go au natural! lol...
L
His Response (on Valentine's Day....way long after his post):
Hi and Happy Valentine's Day! I may have had the wrong woman, bt just thought I'd take a chance to see if you might be all by your lonesome today. Perhaps, if you are, we might chat, meet for a coffee or drink and see where things take us? Or we could meet at Ralph's and flirt in the aisles.
carey
trader joes girl - m4w - 36 (los angeles)
Missed Connection:
I really wanted to say hi to you in the Trader Joes last night, but felt stupid because I was there with my mother! My mistake. Anyway, last night about 6pm at the TJ's on Palms and Sepulvada. You had a hand basket of groceries, and I was eying you in the freezer section. I think you saw me checkin' you out? hehehe
Have a good Sunday!!!
My Response:
I was just checking out the squash...
His Response:
bummer, who ever she was, I'd hoped we could have chatted:(
have a good night
My Response:
Next time, you should say so...
His Response:
i know... i'm too shy, but she was cute and smiled at me, and I still blew it!!!
what do you say at supermarkets???
My Response:
My zucchini selection would do wonders in your salad...
His Response:
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm gonna remember that!!!!!!! brilliant!!!!!!!!
you don't have a nose ring do you?
I really wanted to say hi to you in the Trader Joes last night, but felt stupid because I was there with my mother! My mistake. Anyway, last night about 6pm at the TJ's on Palms and Sepulvada. You had a hand basket of groceries, and I was eying you in the freezer section. I think you saw me checkin' you out? hehehe
Have a good Sunday!!!
My Response:
I was just checking out the squash...
His Response:
bummer, who ever she was, I'd hoped we could have chatted:(
have a good night
My Response:
Next time, you should say so...
His Response:
i know... i'm too shy, but she was cute and smiled at me, and I still blew it!!!
what do you say at supermarkets???
My Response:
My zucchini selection would do wonders in your salad...
His Response:
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That's awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm gonna remember that!!!!!!! brilliant!!!!!!!!
you don't have a nose ring do you?
TIMMY NOLANS - BURBANK SATURDAY NIGHT - m4w
Missed Connection:
THIS IS A LONG SHOT, BUT HERE GOES. YOU WERE SITTING AT THE BAR IN A RED DRESS WITH A FRIEND. I MADE EYE CONTACT WITH YOU A FEW TIMES. I WAS HOPING TO TALK TO YOU, BUT MY FRIEND BEGAN TALKING ABOUT SOME HEAVY STUFF FROM HIS CHILDHOOD--NO JOKE. SO I WAS SORT OF TRAPPED IN MY SEAT ALL NIGHT. YOU HAVE GREAT EYES. YOU SHOULD WRITE BACK...
My Response:
Woah. I don't like a guy that writes in all caps. Learn how to type without urgency and maybe I'll meet you.
His reponse (his email: boredinla):
You're a troll's troll.
My Response:
Why are you bored in LA, boredinla?
His Response:
Why do you pseudo-troll?
My Response:
I'm making connections with people that want to make them.
His Reponse:
Why are you making connections with me?
My Response:
As you are bored in this city, I am disconnected.
THIS IS A LONG SHOT, BUT HERE GOES. YOU WERE SITTING AT THE BAR IN A RED DRESS WITH A FRIEND. I MADE EYE CONTACT WITH YOU A FEW TIMES. I WAS HOPING TO TALK TO YOU, BUT MY FRIEND BEGAN TALKING ABOUT SOME HEAVY STUFF FROM HIS CHILDHOOD--NO JOKE. SO I WAS SORT OF TRAPPED IN MY SEAT ALL NIGHT. YOU HAVE GREAT EYES. YOU SHOULD WRITE BACK...
My Response:
Woah. I don't like a guy that writes in all caps. Learn how to type without urgency and maybe I'll meet you.
His reponse (his email: boredinla):
You're a troll's troll.
My Response:
Why are you bored in LA, boredinla?
His Response:
Why do you pseudo-troll?
My Response:
I'm making connections with people that want to make them.
His Reponse:
Why are you making connections with me?
My Response:
As you are bored in this city, I am disconnected.
ALISON WHERE ARE YOU - m4w
Missed Connection:
i want you to draw me nude, or just your company. please let me know where you are.
My Reponse:
Stop asking me to draw you nude. I never said I wanted to. (You're not fat enough). I can't let you know where I am because I joined a cult.
i want you to draw me nude, or just your company. please let me know where you are.
My Reponse:
Stop asking me to draw you nude. I never said I wanted to. (You're not fat enough). I can't let you know where I am because I joined a cult.
Why do Women hate short guys so much? - m4w - 38 (silver lake)
Missed Connection:
I dont get it. Is 5" 8' the end of the world? That is like me saying I only like women with Big B**bs-
My Reponse:
I don't get it. Your analogy is dumb. I can always enlarge my b**bs to meet your desires- but I don't think you will ever be able to enlarge your legs. Get over your shortass self.
I dont get it. Is 5" 8' the end of the world? That is like me saying I only like women with Big B**bs-
My Reponse:
I don't get it. Your analogy is dumb. I can always enlarge my b**bs to meet your desires- but I don't think you will ever be able to enlarge your legs. Get over your shortass self.
If anyone can put me in touch with this one... - m4w
Missed Connection:
I would be forever grateful. Last known address was near the intersection of Melrose and Fairfax.
Thanks :)
My Response:
How did you get my picture???!?!?!? Have you been stalking me again, Robert!??!?!?!
I would be forever grateful. Last known address was near the intersection of Melrose and Fairfax.
Thanks :)
My Response:
How did you get my picture???!?!?!? Have you been stalking me again, Robert!??!?!?!
I smoke weed every day of the week - m4w - 23
Missed connection:
That's right bitch. I'm a rich and famous record producer now too. :)
My response:
Hold the mutha fuckin' phone...How am I supposed to tell my mama that you gonna be takin care of our babies?
That's right bitch. I'm a rich and famous record producer now too. :)
My response:
Hold the mutha fuckin' phone...How am I supposed to tell my mama that you gonna be takin care of our babies?
Delta Flight from Atlanta to LA - m4w - 24 (LA)
Missed Connection:
We caught eyes several times, I had a beard and a shaved head ... you had red hair and in isle 20 or 21 ... let me know what you were wearing, maybe someday we will meet ....
My response:
I wasn't wearing no panties. Does that turn you on?
We caught eyes several times, I had a beard and a shaved head ... you had red hair and in isle 20 or 21 ... let me know what you were wearing, maybe someday we will meet ....
My response:
I wasn't wearing no panties. Does that turn you on?
Gray BMW on Sunset - m4w - 24 (Sunset)
Missed Connection:
You drive a gray 2-door 3 series. We both had to pull over when the ambulance was trying to get by behind us. I noticed you made eye contact with me a couple times, but maybe it was just cause you needed to pull over. Anyway, if you made eye contact for other reasons, let me know ;)
My response:
I have a lazy eye so if some shit happens on the road, I have to look around me a lot to make sure I won't get hit.
You drive a gray 2-door 3 series. We both had to pull over when the ambulance was trying to get by behind us. I noticed you made eye contact with me a couple times, but maybe it was just cause you needed to pull over. Anyway, if you made eye contact for other reasons, let me know ;)
My response:
I have a lazy eye so if some shit happens on the road, I have to look around me a lot to make sure I won't get hit.
Tuesday
reading the paper at Coffee Table Bistro - m4w (eagle rock)
Missed Connection:
You were enjoying the nice sunny day reading the newspaper at the Coffee Table Bistro around noon. I was the bearded monster catching lunch with 2 of my co-workers. You laughed as we acted like eye googling idiots. I wanted to say hi but instead I'm writing this feeble attempt at redemption. =)
My response:
What do you have to redeem? Googly eyes? I think those are rad. I would glue a ton to my backpack if I still had one.
You were enjoying the nice sunny day reading the newspaper at the Coffee Table Bistro around noon. I was the bearded monster catching lunch with 2 of my co-workers. You laughed as we acted like eye googling idiots. I wanted to say hi but instead I'm writing this feeble attempt at redemption. =)
My response:
What do you have to redeem? Googly eyes? I think those are rad. I would glue a ton to my backpack if I still had one.
Asian girl in black dress at USC Starbucks - m4w - 26 (Downtown LA)
Missed connection:
We were both at Starbucks today around 8 - 9 PM. I had tattoos and was wearing a black tshirt. We made eye contact a few times, you laughed when I ran into the chair. Your super cute, hope you see this.
My response:
I laughed at you because your tattoos sucked. Not because you were clumsy. Duh. Thank you for saying I am cute though. (I already know it...LOL...!)
We were both at Starbucks today around 8 - 9 PM. I had tattoos and was wearing a black tshirt. We made eye contact a few times, you laughed when I ran into the chair. Your super cute, hope you see this.
My response:
I laughed at you because your tattoos sucked. Not because you were clumsy. Duh. Thank you for saying I am cute though. (I already know it...LOL...!)
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About Me
- Alessandra Rizzotti
- Writer. Published in Harper Perrenial's Six Word Memoirs on Love and Heartbreak, It All Changed in an Instant, as well as the front page of Smith's online magazine for more than 200 six word stories. Video art exhibited in Miranda July and Harrel Fletcher's "Learning to Love You More" gallery as well as the Baltic Contemporary Art Museum. Alessandra currently tells jokes all around Los Angeles and produces Heeb Magazine's monthly storytelling show in LA.
